Preach it, Sistah Anne.
Troops, if you ever feel like you need to edit your own pasts to protect abusers, or to give toads the benefit of the doubt, or to keep from making waves (all MUCH more honorable reasons than the narcissist’s reasons, when he edits the past just to get what he wants), well, let those days be over.
Talk about, write down, and/or think through what happened with clarity, confidence and honesty, and let the responsibility for events fall where it may. You know the reality, and it’s time to trust it. The Army is protecting YOU. It’s giving YOU the benefit of the doubt. It’s calming things in YOUR mind and YOUR life.
End the voicelessness. Tell your story. Let the healing begin.
Note to give props: ‘Boy Reading to Elephant’ is by one of Aunt Alex’s favorite artists, Gregory Colbert. You can check him out at gregorycolbert.com.
Editing the past? Oh. my. goodness. That was most of my problem. I was so confused by the “That never happened and your lying” statements he would make every single time I called him out on his bad behavior that by the end I didn’t know up from down. Confusion had led me to a state of purgatory. I’m so glad I made it out.