Top Ten Reasons Why My Cat is Better Than a Narcissist.

10. After I feed it goodies, my cat curls up in my lap and purrs instead of going over to the neighbor’s house to ask HER for goodies.

9. My cat brings me gifts that he truly thinks I’ll enjoy, just because he loves me. Yes, I prefer his dead mole to a narcissist’s bottle of perfume that he got at the Dollar Store.

8. My cat might ignore me sometimes, but he doesn’t ignore me and then say he didn’t.

7. When he wants to stay out all night, my cat never tells me it’s my fault for being too needy.

6. I’ve never caught my cat flirting with someone and saying he doesn’t already have an owner with whom he lives.

5. A narcissist will tell you the relationship is on the rocks if he’s feeling a little bored. My cat just takes a nap.

4. Cats actually bond with people, their kittens, each other, and other species. My cat’s never faked an emotion a day in his life.

3. Ever seen a cat make an ass of himself by trying to talk about your feelings and why those feelings are wrong? Nope. Me either.

2. My cat hisses when he’s mad, instead of carrying on like an insane berserker on crack who makes about a much sense as a mumbling wombat.

And the Number One reason why my cat is better than a narcissist:

1. I’m SURE my cat has never, EVER tried on my underwear.


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7 Responses to Top Ten Reasons Why My Cat is Better Than a Narcissist.

  1. Number 3. Most certainly, number 3. And when the Marriage Counselor diddn’t agree with him that my feelings were wrong, he made an ass out of himself explaining to HER why my feelings were wrong. Then he never returned because she was an “idiot”. Yeah right. Whatever.

  2. Thank you for some comic relief. I am so tired of living in my own head about this insanity and trying to hash it out…it seems I dig further and further into the abyss. Great Job!

  3. Deb Ordway

    Makes me want to get a cat!

  4. Sue

    Definately prefer my cat – replaced my corsets, knickers and underwear since the Toad left….
    Why does these men? dress up this way in sex.
    Makes me feel like puking when I think about it – disgusting
    Sent my Solicitor details of the divorce and said that I would drop off his ladies clothes at the OW’s – Still waiting for a reply.
    Karma Be With U.

  5. Moke

    Strangely I chose your ten reasons by following up on an image on google and it is appropriate because I just began an art project comparing a narcissist to my cat. The basic difference is that my cat is imperfect but makes me feel great, while the narcissist believes he’s perfect and makes others feel substandard inferior.


  6. Lauren

    Oh. This is rich, this so good. I about died at the last one. Mine was also totally unsure about his sexual identity but sure as hell lied about that too. I wish you continued your posts, they are absolutely brilliant and entertaining. However I’m thoroughly enjoying reading through all the old posts as well. Thank you SO MUCH for creating this blog and I will be checking out your books!

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